My motivation and determination. I let it go. I got a little overly confident and I've been resorting back to my old (& bad) ways. I was seeing such big losses on the scale! I was doing so well! That extra muffin, or little bag of pretzels isn't going to hurt me right?? Right? WRONG!
I'm coming clean ladies.
It's the only way....
Warning: Following admissions may shock and possibly disgust.
Saturday started off wrong with Omelette's and Chicken bacon for breakfast. I missed my cereal so I had some for lunch. Supper was eaten at my brother's and was a mix of egg rolls, rice, stir fry and meatballs. Apple crisp and Crispy Crunch ice cream may have also been added. The night was capped off with a Snickers bar and a bag of Baked Doritos. Did I need these? NO. But it was Saturday and I wanted to use all of my flex points! Ugh
Sunday it was a piece of Graham Cracker Pie and Crispy Crunch Ice Cream that I SO did NOT even remotely have the points for. Oh and don't forget the black bean dip and mutigrain Tostitos! I had already used ALL of my 35 bonus points before I even made my way over to dinner at my brother's house. But there I was scarfing down chips and dip and pie and ice cream. Loving every minute of it.
Monday it was an extra 2 muffins (Yes 2!) and as Angie so nicely pointed out, those 1 point muffins aren't really one point when you are cramming in 2 or 3 at a time. I had already used up my points for the day but I couldn't resist. In total, I had 3 muffins on Monday night. 3 Muffins!!! That's probably about 5 or 6 points if I added it up correctly instead of trying to convince myself that it's only 3 points!
Tuesday I found myself wandering dangerously close to the vending machine at work around 3:00 when I usually get the munchies. I had the Rold Gold Honey Wheat Pretzel twists. They were three points. I only counted them as 2 on my journal. Why??? I don't friggin know. I'm only lying to myself! Then there was the end of the day when all points had been used. (Also I must admit that 2 points were spent on Fat Free frozen Whipped cream right out of the tub) and I wandered over to the fridge for no reason and cut off about an ounce of low fat cheese and scarfed it down. I NEVER eat cheese right out of the fridge. This is NOT like me.
I should also mention that Saturday through Wednesday I consumed well over 2 L of diet pop, which again, is NOT like me at all. I usually have about 2 glasses of diet pop a week and I always save it up for the weekend, like Friday night with my homemade pizza.
Wednesday things are starting to look brighter and I start coming to my senses. Kind of. I had a mini melt down at the gym because I forgot my elastics. My hair is really long and thick and working out with it flying around it not even an option. When I start sweating it feels like I am having a heat stroke. Well I ran over to the store across the way to buy some elastics and of course they didn't have any, not even a rubber band! So instead of staying calm, I storm off to go get groceries. However, I did have an NSV yesterday. We had a unit meeting after lunch and I was in charge of picking up some munchies. So I went and got a veggie tray (that will teach them to send the WW girl to get munchies!) but I also bought some Cherry danishes for the people who like sweets. Well as they were being passed around I took out a small Danish and placed it on my plate. I must have stared at that thing for about 10 mins before deciding it wasn't even worth it. Threw my napkin over it and smooshed it up. ANd I stayed within all of my point yesterday.
Thursday I am feeling good DESPITE seeing a 1 lb gain on the scale this morning but I deserve it right? I mean look at how my week has gone so far??! It just really helps to spell it all out n here so I can really see where I've been going wrong. Lots of "empty points" seem to be finding their way back into my plan as well. Have to kick that habit. No way am I straying from my points today. No. WAY.
As far as Kelly & Sarah's exercise Challenge I have 2 workouts in so far, another one will be added tonight after work and yet another tomorrow after work. Yup. You heard me. I'm going to the gym on Friday. I've never been to the gym on a Friday. Hmm I wonder what it's like. I guess I'll find out. Saturday I plan on either A) going for a walk or B) spending 2 hours raking leaves. That should round off my 5 workouts.
Thanks for letting me vent ladies (not that you had a choice) but you have no idea how much it helped me re-focus!